Arguing vehemently with our friend Mike that such a thing as "Chicken Taco Seasoning" does not exist (ha, ha, Mike, you have no idea what you are talking about) and then going to the store and seeing it plain as day, right there on the shelf. Turns out...crow STILL doesn't taste that good.
...Delivering firewood at Kwik Trip and seeing some money laying on the windowsill. It was 7 cents. At the same time I was about to say "No, Nikki, leave it there, we won't take anything that is not ours", Jeremy says "Go ahead, Nikki. You can have it. Finders, keepers."
Seriously, dude? I have been telling them for years not to take anything that isn't theirs. I told Jeremy this, but guess what? The 7 cents still came home in Nikki's pocket.
And then she left it in her pants and it ended up in the laundry. And now it is in our change jar.
Finders, keepers. Losers, weepers.
...Sitting in the chair with Nikki and hearing her say "Hey, move your gluteus maximus!" In perfect pronunciation.
Apparently, her aunts in Ohio have been teaching her a bit about body parts. Since I laughed the first time, she may or may not have said the phrase "gluteus maximus" approximately 30 times in the past 5 days!
...Hey, I made up a little rhyme for you. (There's a little awkwardness for you!)
It goes like this:
This is my swimsuit...
This is me...
The two of us together,
You shall never see.
Ha, ha.
Now for the story. Apparently, some random visitors from Pennsylvania who stopped in unexpectedly at our house about a week ago, DID get to see my in my swimsuit.
In our shop. Trying to put air into a tube for the pool. All kinds of awkward bending.
I had no idea they were sitting in our driveway watching me.
The best part (oh, yeah, wait for it...)
Them seeing me...
In my swimsuit...
Trying to run the air compressor...
Pulling the release valve by mistake...
Jumping like crazy when it made a super loud hissing noise...
And then high kicking it back into place with my right foot.
Wow!! That's all I have to say. Wow!!
Next time...maybe call first, people! Because I bet your nightmares of that scene are haunting you still.
...The fact that multiple times a day I hear this coming from my children's mouths:
"I like big Bibles and I cannot lie...
You Christian brothers can't deny..."
Yup...its the song "Baby Got Book"
Thanks again to the Ohio Aunts for this one! ;-)
Ok. It is pretty funny. You should watch it.
...The fact that Nikki wears this dress almost continuously. To the point that my friends are starting to question whether or not I ever do laundry.
...Assuming (outloud. In question form) that an older man and older woman who were both at our church on a particular Sunday were married. Wow! That was all kinds of awkward.
...The fact that I use my sports bra as an I-phone holder when I do my walk/run. (Sorry. No picture!)
And to make it worse, I have taken to putting the phone into a plastic bag so I don't get it wet when I run in this humid weather.
Seriously. I have no idea how many levels of redneck this makes me.
...Speaking of running...This is along my route.
Can you guess what it might be?
I thought it was a pile of straw that fell off of the wagon or tractor on the way to the neighbor's farm.
Upon closer inspection, I realized that straw does not have feet.
Or bones.
GROSS!!
Poor Mr. Porcupine.
May he rest in peace.
...Me stopping a lady in the grocery store (Never mind her crying baby...I had something important to say) to tell her how much I Loved her July 4th outfit.
She had on the CUTEST navy and white dress with red accessories. (Shoes, sunglasses, earrings)
I am now super obsessed with that dress.
She told me she got it from Target but I am afraid she either lied (doubtful) or got it last year, because I just searched the Target website and didn't find it. Dang!!
Anyway...Happy 4th of July to you!!
May your day be full of freedom and fun!
And no awkwardness.
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